Prodigal Children

Dating Services- Could Be The Answer To Your Prayers

For a long, long time dating has been a tricky process. Once you get out of high school and college, meeting women was difficult at best. It seemed bar hopping was about the only option you had. Now days, with the mainstream use of the internet you can find your soul mate without even having to leave the house.

Online dating services are widely popular and a lot of couples meet through them and get married. Despite the success rate of these services, many guys give up and end up not meeting anybody. It is not that the service does not work, it is that you may not be doing everything you can.

The biggest reason guys fail at these online services is because they are not use to using them. This newness means it is easy to make mistakes, to prevent these mistakes and increase your chance for success there are several tips you should try out before throwing in the towel.

1. Be unique. This is one big flaw a lot of guys make, they try to appeal to everyone. All this does is make you come off as some boring guy that nobody really cares about. Instead of doing that, make your profile about you. Think about the kind of woman you want to be with and tailor your profile towards what that type of woman might be looking in a guy.

Do not lie or anything, since obviously they will find out if you are lying. But wording things in such a way as to attract their attention is never wrong. Just be honest about yourself and women who are interested in that type of man will be willing to give you a shot.

2. Be confident. Women are, for the most part, attracted to confident men. The key to these online dating services is to make yourself come off as a confident guy with a lot to offer. The way you do this is by being careful how you word things. Women do not want a needy, insecure guy so by starting with an opening line like "You probably wont respond.." or "I'm not sure you care.." will just turn them off.

Instead, use confidence, show that you are worth her time and that she can either talk to you or you will go find someone else. Do not sound like an arrogant jerk, but make sure she knows you have something to offer.

3. Stay positive. People can pick up on vibes, even through the internet. The way you word things can tell her volumes. When using online dating services you need to make sure you sound upbeat and positive. Even if you are depressed or feel like this is hopeless, never let her catch onto this.

Instead, fill your profile with positive lines. You have something to offer, everyone does, so put that out there. Do not let negativity drag you down or influence what you are putting into your profile. No matter how lonely or sad you may be, never ever say it out loud (or type it).

Dating Service For Women Are They For You

The image of a soldier standing valiantly to protect their home country is one that resonates with a lot of people. Of course, it's also true that most people will picture a man in the role of that soldier, but such thinking is simply behind the times in most countries. Even so, dating service women has a strong appeal to a lot of men, and for various reasons.

It wasn't all that long ago--in the bigger scope of things--that women in the military were more of a rarity. For that reason, more and more men are wondering about the ins and outs of dating service women. Here are some things to keep in mind if you would like to be romantically involved with a woman in uniform.

Going out with an enlisted woman comes with some challenges that aren't a problem when dating civilian women. Heck, they're not even thought of as "civilian women" by most people. Does that mean you shouldn't go out with a woman who is in the military? Not at all. While there may some differences, it's fairly easy to work around them when you're aware of them.

The main thing you should know is that active military personnel can be called up to serve anywhere around the world at a moment's notice. It may not be a pleasant thought, but as long as you know it's a real possibility, it will easier to deal with should it happen. If it does happen, then you need to be supportive of them. Remember, they will be dealing with a lot of things at the same time, so anything you can do to make that easier will be appreciated.

Even if she is never called up to serve oversees, she will probably be moved to a different military base every few years. If you want to be dating service women, then you need to keep that in mind. How serious of a relationship do you want? Will you be willing to move around with her? Will she want you to? What about having a long distance relationship?

Asking questions ahead of time is a good idea. If you plan on it being a casual relationship, that's fine, as long as both of you are aware of that. But if it's getting serious, then you should talk about the different things that could happen, and have a plan of action in place if any of them should happen.

Dating service women isn't entirely different from dating any other women, though. While the military is often associated with being tough, and masculine; most military women like to feel feminine. You can do a lot to help them feel that way if you are going out with them. Romance is the key. Take them out dancing, have a nice romantic dinner or buy them flowers every now and then. Anything you can do to make them feel special will be appreciated. Keeping all of these things in mind will you to have a much better time when you're seeing each other.

Dating Relationship-Be True To Your Self For A Healthy Relationship

Most of us know that sometimes entering into a dating relationship can be equivalent to walking through a mine field. We enter into the relationship with high hopes and expectations. Sometimes those high hopes are realized, sometimes they aren't.

If you want to learn some simple tips to increase your chances of making any dating relationship you are a part of much more successful and happy, keep reading. I have compiled some simple information that may be able to help you out.

Now, I'm not claiming that any of this is new stuff, most of it is just common sense. But even with common sense issues you sometimes need a little reminder or you may just overlook a few points.

So, here we go:

1. The first thing I always tell people who aren't currently in a relationship but want to be is: work on you first. I'm not trying to imply that anyone is a huge mess but we all have varying degrees of issues and baggage.

Trying to identify and get rid of those issues and baggage is best undertaken before you meet someone rather than during or after the relationship. For one reason, the less baggage and issues you have and the more "whole" person you are will dictate what type of people you meet. So taking care of your own business first will make it much more likely that you will meet someone who is worthwhile.

For example, let's say that you have a lot of lingering hurt and trust issues because someone in your past cheated on you. If you just try to push these issues down without really facing them and getting over them, they will continue to haunt you.

Whether you realize it or not, you will attract other people who have similar issues. You will likely attract people who will do exactly what you expect them to do: cheat on you.

Fix yourself first.

2. Do not underestimate the importance of a high level of compatibility. I'm not talking about the two of you agreeing on everything but rather the two of you having similar outlooks on the important things such as honesty, fidelity, respect, etc.

If you think honesty is one of the most important characteristics a person can have, why would you even consider getting involved with someone who doesn't have a problem with "embellishing"? You are just setting yourself up for one disappointment after another.

So, when I say find someone you are compatible with, it's not to say that the two of you shouldn't have different taste in movies or music (though having a little overlap in likes will make social activities easier to plan out) I'm talking about having similar outlooks on the big things.

So,  if you want a happy and successful dating relationship, take time to work on yourself an find someone who has similar outlooks on the big things. Incompatiblity can make your whole relationship one stress filled misunderstanding after another. Who needs that?

Dating For Fun-May Mean One Thing To You

Even if you are only dating for fun and aren't interested in something more serious, you still will have more chance (and probably more fun) if you have some "ground rules" set up first.

I don't mean that you have to do a big list of rules or anything like that, I just mean do what you can to ensure that you and your partner know what you each expect and want from each other and the relationship.

The term "dating for fun" may mean one thing to one person and something quite different to the other. To make things easier for both of you and to reduce the risk of hurt, strife and misunderstandings, just talk about what you expect in a relationship.

Here are some things that I mean, some things that you should probably decide for yourself what you want or don't want, and then talk that over with whoever you date so you are both on the same page:

1. Fidelity. This is huge. Many people who are just dating in a casual relationship may also think that means that they don't have to be faithful. They may think that they are still basically a free agent and can do whatever they want to do.

Spelling out your expectations right from the very start, can be a little uncomfortable but it can also save a lot of issues down the road. After all, if you are just looking for fun, you want to have fun.

You sure don't want to have to deal with a lot of complaining and fighting because you thought you could date other people but your dating partner thought that you shouldn't.

2. If you both agree that you don't have to be exclusive, are you going to share your exploits with each other or will you keep it to yourself? Are you sure that neither of you will feel jealousy? And one other thing, both genders are very capable of feeling jealousy no matter what they say.

At the end of the day, and at the risk of sounding sexist, sometimes men can sometimes have two different standards. They may think it's perfectly ok for them to date multiple people but they will often think poorly of any woman who dates a lot of men.

If that describes you, you really should take some time to evaluate the type of person you are. If you are going to judge someone for doing the exact same thing you are doing, that doesn't speak that highly for the type of person you are. Don't tell someone that you don't care if they date others and then turn around and have a problem with it, that's not fair.

So, dating for fun can be... well, fun. But, unless you are honest and open (with your partners as well as with yourself) about what you want, don't want and what you expect, you will most likely have less fun and more stress. It's extremely important for both of you to be on the same page about the specifics of your relationship.

Dating Tips For Men- Communication

In today's world it can be really difficult for men in the dating scene. We guys are raised with the notion that showing excess emotion is a weakness, and that as men we must be strong and composed. This is all well and dandy, but it can make properly expressing ourselves difficult.

The best dating advice out there is that you need to properly communicate. This is why we have trouble with dating though, we have trouble properly communicating. So to help with that are some basic tips you should try to follow to make your dating experience a little better.

1. Look good. First impressions mean a lot, and if you make a bad one it can haunt you for a long time, or maybe even cut your relationship down before it even gets off the ground. So you need to make sure to properly groom yourself and look as presentable as can be. Making a good first impression makes the road to forming a relationship a whole lot easier.

2. Romance. Romance is all well and good, and a lot of women like it. You just have to remember not to go overboard. You are not lovers, you are not even friends yet, so do not think you can act like you are. Instead, take her to places where you can talk and get to know one another. The first step in the road to any good relationship is making friends first. After all, your girlfriend or wife should also be your friend.

3. Conversational skills. Pretty much all dating advice out there will tell you that communication is imperative. Without that, how is anyone suppose to know what you think or how you feel? Having bad conversation skills is nothing to be ashamed of, it is merely something you need to overcome. The key to a conversation is that it is a give and take. You need to talk, but you also need to listen and give them a chance to talk. If only one person is doing all the talking, that is not a conversation, it's a monologue.

4. Be a gentleman. This is probably the most important tip. In today's society most forms of chivalry are long dead, and women do not expect or want it in a lot of forms. It can often be viewed as offensive and demeaning. But do not let that trick you into thinking that you should act any less of a man. As a man you need to treat them with respect and dignity, and always be polite. Even if you find yourself not attracted to the woman, you must treat her to a wonderful evening.

Going on dates and finding love is difficult for everyone, men and women alike. But with these basic tips it can make your search a lot easier. Just remember that you will not find your soul mate right off the bat, and that you need to keep looking until you can find someone who can truly make you happy.

Dating Beautiful Women

No doubt about it, dating is challenging. You have to get up the nerve to ask a woman out, then you have to figure out where to have the date, you have to be on your best behavior (what will you say and do?), and do it all in a way that comes across as confident and natural (no matter how you may be feeling on the inside). A lot of guys have an even harder time when it comes to dating beautiful women. But, as you will see, it doesn't have to be difficult.

Rule #1 is that you should never treat any woman as an object, and that includes pretty women. In other words, while you may be attracted to their physical appearance, you shouldn't think of them as a trophy or status symbol. Granted, other people will notice her beauty, and may look at you differently because of it, but that should never be your reason for wanting to go out with her.

A lot of beautiful women actually run into an interesting problem. Conventional wisdom says that pretty women shouldn't have any problem finding men that want to go out with them. But the reality is that a lot of them find men are afraid to approach them because of their beauty--the very thing that's suppose to get men flocking to them.

Understanding this can help you when dating beautiful women. They are, first and foremost, people too. Just be yourself and try not to treat her as though she is someone that is out of your league. Why? Because that's the other problem pretty women run into. Men overacting and laying the charm on extra heavy, all in the hopes that the woman will enjoy the extra attention. But a lot of the time pretty woman get tired of the phoniness, and ache to find a guy who will just be himself around her.

Now, let's make one thing perfectly clear. Treating them normal and being yourself doesn't mean you should go out of your way to be rude or to ignore her. You would be surprised at how many so-called "relationship experts" will tell you to be a jerk towards beautiful women. Sorry, but that just doesn't cut it! They are people; simple. Just don't play games and treat her as you want her to treat you.

Keep in mind that attractive women often feel that they are being hit on more than other women. So, when it comes to dating beautiful women, forget all of the clever pick up lines. Trust me, they have heard them before. Besides, the very fact that you're using a line shows her that you're trying too hard and that you're just like every other guy who has used a line on her.

Finally, be confident when dating beautiful women. Too many men feel like they're not worthy, but if she has agreed to a date or two, then it proves that she thinks you are indeed worthy, and that's what really counts.

Should You Mend A Relationship

Having a relationship can be a challenge. As much joy as it brings us, it can also bring us a lot of hardships. For a lot of people the good far outweighs the bad, but there are still many relationships out there that suffer from a lot of troubles that can keep them weighted down.

Trying to mend a relationship is also quite difficult and in fact the very act of trying to fix it often times seals it's fate. The reason for this is simply because people do not know what exactly they should do. They have the drive, just not the knowledge. If you do not want girlfriend or boyfriend ex there are some tips to help you out.

1. Positivity. Remaining positive is important when trying to keep any relationship afloat. People can pick up on the vibes you put off, if you put out negative vibes it will make them feel negative around you, and generally just will not do you any good. Keeping positive not only makes yourself feel better, but can rub off on those around you as well.

2. Do not rush. Eagerness can lead to impatience, which is where a lot of couples fail. They are so eager to keep their relationship intact that they actually end up making things worse. Rome was not built in a day and repairing your relationship will not happen overnight either. Take it nice and slow so you do not make mistakes.

3. Communication. The single most important aspect of any relationship is proper communication. If you do not your girlfriend or boyfriend ex then you need to be able to listen to their problems so you can fix them before they cause damage.

However you also need to voice your own, remaining silent does not help anybody. Tell your partner whatever problems you have so that they as well do not become a big issue down the line.

4. Be affectionate. When in a slump, most couples stop being as intimate as they once were. All this does is further drive a wedge between the two of you. You should try to keep the intimacy level the same regardless of the problems you have. Simple gestures such as kisses and hugs can do a lot. Just show your partner that, despite whatever problems you are having you still love them.

5. Look for help. While these tips can do a lot to help you out, sometimes it is simply not enough. If you do not want your girlfriend or boyfriend ex then you need to do whatever you can to keep your relationship above water. If all else fails then you should seek out professional help in the form of a marriage counselor.

Marriage counselors are trained to help you through your troubles and help the two of you work through your problems. Sometimes simply having an objective third party can work wonders. Marriage counselors have saved countless relationships. Do not let fear or hesitation keep you from seeking the help you need. If your relationship is important then you need to do whatever it takes to make it work.

Add Romance-Doesn't Always Mean Roses and Candles

When most of us think of the word romance, we think of love, making love and having an incredible connection with another person. When most of us wonder how we can add romance to our relationship, we often think of sexy nights filled with lingerie, soft music and wine. But is that it? Not that there is anything wrong with this version, but is that the only option we have? Personally, I don't think so.

I'm not sure if I could be considered the most romantic person around. I think I am, but who knows? To me, romance is about a deep connection with someone else. A connection that goes beyond just the lingerie and wine.

I think that anytime two people who love each other are able to spend time together doing activities that they both enjoy, that can be a form of romance. True, it isn't necessarily the type of romance that gets written about but that doesn't mean it can't be romantic for the couple.

If you think about it, the good memories that we hold throughout our lifetime involve two major themes: doing something we enjoy and/ or being with someone we love. When you combine the something you enjoy with the someone you love, I think that is perfect and I think that can be an (often overlooked) way to add romance to any relationship.

Of course, the important distinction here is that is has to be something you both enjoy. It's not really romantic if you want to go hunting and your partner hates to hunt. Even if your partner agrees to go, the romance will be lost on her.

So, pick these "non traditional" romantic gestures carefully. Don't delude yourself into believing that your partner enjoys a certain activity when you know darn well, even if you don't want to admit it to yourself, that they don't.

Another aspect of something that is romantic, again in my opinion, is something out of the ordinary. Years ago I knew a couple (to be honest they were a little weird) who liked to brag that they had sex every single night.

As expected, the husband bragged about it but when I asked his wife if she really enjoyed it that much she said no, it had become more of a habit and wasn't really anything hot and exciting. She said it became a little like brushing her teeth every night before bed... it became routine.

So, whatever romantic gesture(s) you like to do remember that if anything is done too often it becomes routine. Something that is done often will quickly lose it's intensity and can become if not boring than at least not nearly as exciting.

So, if you want to add romance to your relationship, don't restrict yourself to the traditional things (not that there is anything wrong with those, but you want to keep things interesting too). Think about you and your partner and the things you both love to do. Then set up a time when you can do those things together. That can be enormously romantic.

Making a Positive Thinking Strategy

Take time out of your day to be thankful for everything that you have earned, be thankful about your health and your current situation regardless of difficult situations. Being thankful will give you the extra energy it takes to create a better thinking style and stronger attitude adjustments over the longer period of time. Have confidence in yourself to be able to discover your strengths amidst adversity, it is not always easy but nothing worth having ever is.
Take time to exercise whether it be dancing, running, playing with your animal, or with your children or just taking the time to park a little bit further away from a building or taking the steps instead of the elevator. Make it up in your mind that you want to train yourself to do harder things, like running and jumping or playing sports. Find someone who will play with you and it can be more fun. Actively find someone who challenges you and pushes you further to be stronger. Be willing to make mistakes, fall on your face a couple times, throw caution to the wind. It is not about how well you do something it is about how hard you pushed yourself to achieve where you went.
Perfection is not possible so forget ever becoming perfect, you are you with your flaws and all, so is everyone else, so don't worry that you are not qualified, qualify yourself, tell your self that you are capable, and believe it.These are the thoughts to think actively set yourself up to succeed don't believe that you can fail, press onward to achieve victory.

learn to live with your loved ones for the long haul

you never know someone until you talk to someone for a good amount of time, I figure it takes a good solid five years to see someone at their best and their worst and the in between, the way they handle money, what they like to listen to, the way they treat their family the way way they handle kids, how they bounce back from depression how they enjoy the joyful times, their goals, their amount of drive how they treat their friends how they work under pressure. I know that you can't figure that stuff out without at least being friends for five years.

 So learn to live and love your friends for the long haul and don't feel pressured to always rush your love.

Stephen Covey (1932-2012), A Model For What Human Beings Are Truly Capable Of

Stephen Covey (1932-2012), A Model For What Human Beings Are Truly Capable Of

Friends with Benefits

Adult females and for that matter most females are hardwired to hunger close friendships, and these bonds may supply us with unparalleled advantages. Here, a couple of things researchers have lately uncovered about the mightiness of friendships.

The friendly relationship effect: Mountains turn into molehills

How it behaves: In a field of study published in a psychology magazine, research workers asked participants to stand at the bottom of a steep hill and approximate how hard it would be to climb to the top. Those standing with a supporter or friend estimated the climb to the top to be less steep compared with those who were entirely by themselves.

More than that... The longer the field of study participants had known their supporters or friends, the more gentle they approximated the slope to be.

The friendly relationship effect: Disease turns less lethal

How it behaves: Harvard University research has demonstrated that breast cancer patients with no friendly relationship network are 4 times more likely to pass away from the disease than those with 10 or more close supporters or friends.

More than that... Fields of study have likewise demonstrated that social support may lower blood pressure, protect against dementia, and decrease the risk of anxiety and depression.

The friendly relationship effect: tension feels more manageable

How it behaves: When adult females are stressed out, their brains release the feel-good endocrine oxytocin, which promotes them to bond. (Male brains, on the other hand, are more subject to the effects of the endocrines cortisol and adrenaline, which boost the fight-or-flight response.)

More than that... The female reaction is much more effective in mitigating tension and might be one reason adult females tend to outlast men," says a PhD, professor of psychology at Cambridge University.

All in all friendships are good for us and you should begin working on bettering yours and making new ones today.

5 Little Things That Make a Big Difference

1) Read personal development books
You can gain plenty of insights from these
teachers and apply them to your life

2) Take action
The first step to change is by taking action.
Small baby steps will lead to massive change
if you just make the first step.

3) Plan ahead
Planning is essential in every important
aspect, especially your life. Play the
game of life to win!

4) Make friends
Everybody has something to share that will
enrich your life for the better.

5) Exercise
Exercising gives you energy and better health
to take on the challenges of life

How to Wield More Influence

Know What You Want

Have a clear idea in your mind about what to achieve, whether it be changing another person's undesirable behaviours or persuading him to accept your point of view. Fix this idea of what you want to achieve firmly in your mind. Know exactly what you want, and clarify any vague objectives you may have. Clarity of personal purpose is the first step to putting your influencing abilities to work.

Understand Expectations

Have a clear understanding of what others expect of you and what you actually expect of yourself. People often set unrealistic expectations for themselves by gathering up all of the good qualities they see in others, and trying to have them all within themselves. No one expects you to be perfect.

Be Persistent

Resolve to do everything better and be persistent until you attain the results you've been trying to achieve. Anything worth doing once is worth doing again and again. Don't let rejection or any other negative experience stop you. Learn from mistakes, better yourself, and keep on going.

You Must Give in Order to Receive

The old cliché, "there' no such thing as a free lunch," is fact of life. If you want to receive something, learn to pay for it. Some things may have higher prices than others, and some things may have a higher value to you than others. Examine your options carefully and match what you can give with what you want to receive.

Pay Attention to People

People will help you get where you want to go. It will never be easy for you to make it alone. People can teach you and help you become more influential with others. Listen to other people and learn from them.

Expect a Lot

When you expect a lot, you can get a lot. Your expectations of others and yourself will become reality. Whatever you expect to happen will happen. If you push yourself hard, you will start to see results.

Build a Positive Atmosphere

When you create a "win, win, win" situation, you will start to win. When you start to think positively, your life will start to be positive.

Promise a Lot, Deliver More

Promise people a lot, and then give them more. This is the way the highest achievers have made it. Tell people what you will do for them, and then do more.

Give People What They Want

If you want things from others, you must first give. Don't expect others to make the first move - you have to. If you want to get ahead in life and be successful, you must make the first move. Everybody has certain goals and objectives they wish to achieve. If you can help them reach their goals and objectives, they will want to return the favour. Give people what they want and you will always be ahead.

How to Influence People by Finding out What people Need

You will never to be able to control people, but you will be able to let people control themselves in ways that benefit you. If you tell people what to do, they may not listen to you and will probably resent you. You must get people to do what they want to do, while you influence their control over themselves. This post will show you how to do that.

There are two ways to get people to do what you want. The first, behaviour modification, allows you to change a person's undesirable behaviours using positive reinforcement. The second method of influencing is reality modification, and we'll concentrate most of our attention on this. This influencing technique is successful because of the way in which your requests are presented. In this report, I will show you how to get anything. The secret to getting what you want is the way you go about getting it.

Know what people need

There are three main goals people subconsciously seek. They are:

1. Symbolic rewards 2. Material gains 3. Security

Symbolic rewards

We all have the need for symbolic rewards, such as recognition and praise. Everybody wants to feel important and special. The act of praising and recognizing another is a strong motivator. Always reward good deeds with praise, and give positive, constructive criticism for bad deeds. If you are patient, in time you will see the results of your compliments.

Material rewards

Material rewards mean a lot to people, whether they realize it or not. In any capitalist society, a person's status is judged by his material gains. Therefore, since money produces material gain, it is a strong motivator, and its presence can have a strong influence on others.

Security

Everyone needs security and stability. Security is attained when people feel they belong and are needed by others. People want security in their jobs, friends, family, etc. There are many ways to increase other people's feelings of security:

a) Let people know what you have to offer and what you expect from them in return. Tell them why the relationship you have with them is the way it is.

b) Make people feel that they are needed and belong in the relationship with you. Show a need for their presence.

c) Let others know what their efforts are accomplishing and how they are affecting you. Make them feel important and special to you. Show them that their efforts are appreciated.

d) Make sure that parties in the relationship are compatible

Emphasize comfort

Make sure people are comfortable in their relationships with you. If they are not, find out why and do something about it.

How To Get Action By Talking

It is very important to listen to what other people have to say. It is also important for others to listen to what you have to say.

1.Get the Other Person's Attention                

The first thing you must do when trying to make a point is to get the other person's attention. Make sure the other person is listening to you before you begin talking. If the other person is not listening to you, then you are wasting your time trying to get through to him.

2.Make Your Message Understood

Make sure your message can be fully understood by the others person. Don't use language or terms the other person will not understand.

3.Fill Your Message with Benefits

People want to hear what you will do for them, not what you want from them. Fill your message with benefits. The following two sentences show how this concept works. "I can show you how to be a better person if you listen to me" is much more appealing than. "Listen to me because I am smarter than you."

4.Begin Discussions with Agreements

When you begin a conversation, open with something about which you have a mutual understanding and on which both of you can agree. Here is an example of this concept: IF you want someone to turn the lights off when not in use, you should not say, "keep the lights off, you *@$!!"; instead, you should say "We both want to conserve energy, don't we? So could you please turn off the lights when you leave the room?"

5.Give Reasons for Your Requests

Don't tell someone to do something just because you want him to, or because it is a policy or rule. Give him a reason to listen to you. If you ask someone to follow a policy or rule, tell him why you expect him to follow it. Don't just tell someone to do something - give him a benefit-oriented reason for doing it.

6.Changing Subjects

If you are going to change subject during a conversation, tell the listener that you will be moving on to another subject. If you confuse your listener, he may not listen. It is easier for a person not to listen at all than to try to follow a confusing conversation.

These are 6 ways to have better conversations as you can see the benefits from using these you can start using them in your life.

How Listening Helps You Control Others

Listening is one of the most important necessities of human communication. If you don't listen to people, you are missing out on one of the best ways to influence people. People will always listen to you when you listen to them. One of the greatest influencing tools is listening. When you listen to what's on a person's mind, you will find that communication barriers are broken. Even if you think you know what they are going to say, listen to them. If you are a bad listener, people will think that you are not interested in them. People will like you if listen to them. How do you feel about people who listen to what you have to say? Isn't your admiration for them high? Others will feel the same way about you.

Eliminate All Distractions

Distractions inhibit good talkers and listeners. It is important that you remove all distractions when listening to another person. You want to create a very warm and comfortable atmosphere for the talker.

What Questioning Will Do

Questions we ask people arouse their thinking processes. When you arouse people's think processes, you give them the chance to express their own ideas and feelings. The only way you will find out what you want to know about another is by asking questions. If you are able to help people think on their own they will respect you and like you. You have been able to do something for them that they were not able to do for themselves. By listening to others, you also fulfil their need to feel important. Through your concern, they feel special.

Keep the Conversation Open

In order to listen, you must keep the conversation open. Some people won't tell you everything on their minds, so you may have to question them to keep the conversation going. All of your questions should relate to who, what, why, where, when and how.

What Questions Do You Ask?

The questions you ask must have a specific purpose. If they don't, you will lose credibility. You must ask questions the person understands. Don't confuse other people by asking complicated questions, such as questions with many parts. Ask them one part of a question at a time. Try to get others to tell you "why." "Why" is one of the best questions to ask people. The reason for asking people questions is to get definite answers. Your questions should prompt definite answers, and they should discourage others from guessing at the answers. The therapeutic value of questioning is lost when people guess at answers.

How to Resolve an Argument by Listening

I have solved many arguments just by listening. It may be hard to believe, but it really works. It works when someone is trying to get his point across to you, and when he is yelling and telling you how right he is. Even if the argument is meaningless, here is how to deal with the situation so that you come out on top.

The first thing you should do is listen to what the person has to say without once interrupting. This is where your listening skill will come in handy. You should say "yes" or "I understand" occasionally to show the other person that you are really listening. It is important that you agree with the other person's point of view. If you don't think the other person is right, you must at least let the other person know that you understand his point of view. When the other person is finished saying what he had to say, ask him, "what can I do for you?' This statement throws many people off because they don't expect it. You will find, after using this technique that most people give in to your point of view. The reason for this is that all people really want is for someone to listen to them.

8 Secret Ways to Persuade and Influence People

Persuasiveness is one of the most important skills anyone can learn because it is useful in countless situations. At work, at home, and in your social life, the ability to be persuasive and influence others can be instrumental for achieving goals and being happy.

Learning about the tricks of persuasion can also give you insight into when they're being used on you. The biggest benefit of this is that money will stay in your pockets as you realize just how sales people and advertisers sell you products that you don't necessarily need.

Here are 8 of the best tricks to be persuasive and influence others:

1.Framing

Framing is a technique often used in politics. A popular example of framing is inheritance taxes. Politicians who are opposed to inheritance taxes will call them death taxes. By using the word death instead of inheritance, all kinds of negative connotations come to mind.

Framing is quite subtle, but by using emotionally charged words, like death, you can easily persuade people to your point of view.

2.Scarcity

This is one that advertisers use a lot. Opportunities, whatever they are, seem a lot more appealing when there is a limited availability.

This can be useful to the average person in the right situation, but even more importantly, this is a method of persuasion to be aware of. Stop and consider how much you're being influenced by the fact that a product is scarce. If the product is scarce, there must be a ton of demand for it right?

3.Reciprocation

It's the old saying, "Do unto others...". When someone does something for us, we feel compelled to return the favour. So, if you want someone to do something nice for you, why not do something nice for them first. In a business setting, maybe you pass them a lead. If at home, maybe it's you letting the neighbour borrow the lawn mower. It doesn't matter where or when you do it, the key is to compliment the relationship.

4.Timing

People are more likely to be agreeable and submissive when they're mentally fatigued. Before you ask someone for something they might not be quick to agree to, try waiting until a more opportune time when they've just done something mentally taxing. This could be at the end of the work day when you catch a co-worker on their way out the door. Whatever you ask, a likely response is, "I'll take care of it tomorrow."

5.Congruence

We all try, subconsciously, to be consistent with previous actions. One great example is a technique used by salespeople. A salesperson will shake your hand as he is negotiating with you. In most people’s minds, a handshake equates to a closed deal, and so by doing this before the deal is reached, the salesperson is much more likely to negotiate you in to a closed deal.

A good way to use this yourself is to get people acting before they make up their minds. If, for example, you were out and about with a friend and you wanted to go see a movie but the friend was undecided, you could start walking in the direction of the theater while they make up their mind.

6.Fluid Speech

When we talk, we often use little interjections and hesitant phrases such as "ummm" or "I mean" and of course there is the ubiquitous "like". These little conversation quirks have the unintended effect of making us seem less confident and sure of ourselves, and thus less persuasive.

If you're confident in your speech, others will be more easily persuaded by what you have to say.

7.Herd Behavior

We are all natural born followers. It's sad but true. We constantly look to those around us to determine our actions; we have the need for acceptance.

A simple, effective way to use this to your advantage is to be a leader, let the herd follow you.

8.Friends and Authorities

We are far more likely to follow or be persuaded by someone we like or by someone who is in an authority position. Not only is this a good one to be aware of to combat persuasive techniques being used on you, it's also a good one to use on others because you would be surprised how easy it is to get people to like you and establish authority within groups.

There you go 8 “secret” ways to persuade and influence people, use them at your discretion as each situation calls for different techniques. Different environments lend themselves to one or more technique more often so don’t take these rules as dogma, try them all and see which ones work best in certain situations and learn from them.

Why Seek Inspiration

For anything excellent and great that you wish to accomplish in your life, there's one imperative requirement - inspiration. A great inspiration brings with it a wave of power that by itself may propel you over the finish line. Conversely when we're empty of inspiration, everything may appear hard, boring and dull, and we acquire no joy out of what we're doing.

Inspiration is so crucial as it keeps the mind positive and centered on the greater picture. We frequently believe we're in command of our minds and what we think, but even a brief analysis of our thoughts brings out another story: that our damaging thoughts act as a big barrier to our self growth.

The mind is really prone to wavering and doubt, shifting from one way to the other at a moment’s notice. Frequently when you feel a deep inner yearning to achieve something, the mind will initially go along with it, lured by the novelty factor. But, when the going gets fierce and you start to encounter roadblocks in accomplishing your goal, the mind will frequently be the first one to jump ship! By bringing in outer sources of inspiration to your life, you help your mind “see the forest for the trees” and work with you to accomplish your goals.

Occasionally the process of bringing purpose and meaning into your life means you have to boldly step into territory unmapped by most of the individuals around you. You start to explore choices beyond the nine-to-five cycle of eating, working and sleeping, and start to move away towards a deeper sense of being. As many of those around you aren’t as interested as you are in living out your total potential, it's really simple to feel that you're ploughing a lone furrow, and this may make you question if indeed you're doing the right thing . That’s why staying in touch with inspiring individuals and reading inspiring stories is so crucial, as it lets you see that other people have been in same place as you. If they've gone on to accomplish their goals, then why can’t you?

As the mind gets bored of new things really quickly, you perpetually need to refill your source of inspiration:

Having like minded individuals around you can be excellent in that regard - you are able to guarantee that if one individual in the group isn’t feeling particularly inspired, somebody else will be, and their inspiration will act as a lift-me-up tonic. Likewise, together you serve as a valuable source of fresh ideas - when one individual discovers something that works for them, and then he or she may share that with everybody else.

Forever keeping a sense of newness in what you do is always crucial - for instance, to stop my meditation practice from getting dull and uninspired, I frequently add a fresh piece of music to my morning routine, or redecorate my meditation space.

Reading may be a powerful source of inspiration, as it directly bears upon the mind. Reading personal inspiration stories may be particularly powerful, as you are able to put yourself in the shoes of that individual and imagine yourself overcoming those roadblocks.

You are able to utilize the inspiration you have as a launching pad to increase your ambition - your inner yearning for fulfillment. Many individuals who give seminars on success in different areas all state the same thing - that the difference between accomplishing a goal and not accomplishing it is merely whether you desired it badly enough.

The very act of increasing your ambition helps to inwardly move you away from the situation you're disgruntled with, and you feel that inside your heart you're really beginning to bring about the changes that you wish to see in your life.

Putting Things Off

Procrastination is when you get bumped off the “course” you set for yourself for the day. The challenge of outfoxing procrastination is the challenge of resisting the itch to leave your course. This is likewise the challenge of beating blocks, since a block is truly an ongoing procrastination issue that lasts weeks, months, years or decades.

Let’s suppose you planned to be at your PC, working at a project, at 10 a.m. on a Monday morning, but you’re not. How come? The answer may be one or more of the accompanying.

Woke up late.

Scrapped with your lover last night, and continue reliving the quarrel in your brain.

Are too sapped – the coffee hasn’t set in yet.

Are overly hyper – drank too much coffee and can’t sit motionless.

Are net surfing or net shopping.

Are playing Solitaire.

Simply realized that it's highly crucial to work on another project.

Or, if you work in a home office:

Switched on the television set for “a minute” and saw that one of your favorite actors was being interviewed, so you decide to view the interview.

Simply realized that the laundry urgently needs to get done!

These are common things that may throw you off your course. It’s only a partial list; naturally, you may likely add many other entries to it. There are likely 100s of potential “bumps” that may knock you off your course.

You'll need to learn to resist the urge to get absorbed into activities not on your schedule, regardless how crucial or virtuous they appear at the moment.

Even in moments of non-motivation, act as if you're extremely motivated. This is because of a fantastic thing that behavioral scientists have discovered: that not only do our emotions order our actions, but our actions often order our emotions.

A lot of sales people, performers, athletes and other peak performers formulate a personal collection of tricks, rituals, and physical and mental exercises to help themselves get and stay pumped for their workday. You ought to do the same thing.

Connecting With Self And Something More

For centuries, spiritual precepts have pointed us to the heart and soul as the source of wisdom, truth, peace, and eternal life. We call it the heart and soul because these deeper realities are felt most strongly in the region of the physical heart.

The truth opens up the heart and soul. This capability to sense the truth is something we all already bear. We all have a heart and soul that's already precisely showing us how true matters are.

Once you meet truth, the sense of your self opens up, enlarges, softens, fills out, and relinquishes. The sense of your world is no longer felt to be so confined or little. It gets to be more complete and limitless. The limits soften and fade away, and any sense of deficiency, limit, or deficiency is decreased or annihilated.

A lot of beliefs and suppositions shape and limit our experience of life and connecting and the sense of our self even when we’re not consciously considering them. They're thoughts and concepts that are so deeply trusted that they’re not even questioned, like “life is short” or “I have to have more money.”

Moreover, these notions and assumptions render other thoughts, which add to the momentum of thinking and keep your heart and soul, the sensation of your self, little and compressed.

Make acquaintances with the angels, who while invisible are forever with you... Frequently call them, and make great use of their help and assistance in all your temporal and spiritual matters.

We’re forever in the company of angels whether we decide to acknowledge them or not. They're forever by your side, guiding and protecting you whether you decide to believe in them or not.

Connecting with your angels may be a very rewarding and spiritually fulfilling experience.  you may become closer with your angels, associate with them and gain knowledge, insight, protection, guidance and/or emotional solace from that association.

The fullness of existence is revealed in the small truths that comprise our lives.

Managing Time

A good time manager is likewise thought to be a great leader. How come? Because they take the essential steps toward accomplishing goals for their business. They look around and discover things and areas that need fine-tuning and apply principles toward making them work.

A great time manager likewise knows how to lead and motivate other people in discovering originative ways to make better use of their time. They lead by example and are free with their assistance and info. As leaders, they perpetually share ways, tips and techniques on becoming a better manager of time, states of affairs and conditions.

Running business online calls for the entrepreneur to be an effective manager of their time, enabling them to grapple several projects or businesses at one time, and, being able to manage them all in an efficient fashion.

The net entrepreneur can't enjoy any of their business success if they're dropping off customers, running out of time - not being able to bill their customers for that time, or unable to complete their projects.

Being able to successfully handle projects is among the key indicators of a home business enterpriser who manages their time well. Do they manage by crises or by intent? Is it part of their goal to go either slowly or quickly in project management, aiming toward a wanted result?

The affect that this may have on the work from home entrepreneur impacts any potential succeeding business and may likewise taint their net reputation. All of this is tied into suitable and effective time management! Is there an answer for this hurdle?

Time = Management

Make things as easy as possible. This means streamlining procedures and making things work easier. For example, if you take credit cards in your business, make that more available than having to deal with checks that have to be carried to the bank, cashed and/or deposited. If there are steps to a procedure that may be eliminated, do that and watch your productivity zoom.

The more you simplify, the simpler it will be for your business to run. Things and procedures run smoother with fewer steps and decrease the possibilities of mistakes.

Be Happy With Your Life

 There are a lot of successful individuals out there who are living their life as they wish to. They're working hard doing what they utterly love to do. The most successful individuals are those who work towards the things they're passionate about and like. There are a lot of reasons for this. The more you like what you do the harder you're going to work at it, as you'll be enjoying your work.

If you feel like you're bored with your life or not doing what you ought to be doing with it then it's time to make a change. There might be obstructions or fears holding you back from achieving the goals you've set forth in your life. It's time to get past the obstructions and make your aspirations occur.

 If you're not a happy individual that's a choice, you're arriving at. You've total control over your life and the conclusions that you arrive at. There are a lot of factors by which individuals measure happiness. A few individuals believe money is happiness all the same, they may be utterly miserable with what they do on a day-to-day basis to make their cash.

You may look at individuals who have utterly everything and you endeavor to be like them. These matters might be wealthiness, possessions, status, or even the position you hold at work. These matters don’t produce happiness. Happiness is a selection.

Success isn't measured by income. Even the richest individuals can be really unhappy with their lives. In order to be pleased you have to follow your passions and the wealth and successes will follow along afterwards.

There are a lot of ways to seek and discover your passion. You may learn what your passion is by asking yourself a lot of questions. You may have the answer adorned all over your home and walls.  You are an individual who's worth living their passion. You've the same capabilities as anybody else. You merit happiness and you deserve to live out your passions.